Ted (2012) [Blu-ray]
Comedy | Fantasy

Tagline: John, I look like something you give to your kid when you tell 'em Grandma died.

Family Guy creator Seth MacFarlane delivers his signature boundary-pushing humor in the outrageous comedy-blockbuster critics are calling "hysterically funny!" (Peter Travers, Rolling Stone)

John Bennett (Mark Wahlberg) is a grown man whose cherished teddy bear came to life as the result of a childhood wish - and hasn't left his side since. Can John's relationship with longtime girlfriend, Lori (Mila Kunis), move forward with his lovably profane buddy in the picture?

Storyline: John makes a Christmas miracle happen by bringing his one and only friend to life, his teddy bear. The two grow up together and John must then choose to stay with his girlfriend or keep his friendship with his crude and extremely inappropriate teddy bear, Ted. Written by Anonymous

Reviewer's Note: Reviewed by Kenneth Brown on November 30, 2012 -- Story by Seth MacFarlane. Screenplay by Seth MacFarlane. Directed by Seth MacFarlane. Starring Seth MacFarlane. Produced by Seth MacFarlane. Ted isn't just MacFarlane's big screen directorial debut, it's a message to Hollywood: Um, yeah. That thing I did on TV? I'm about to do it here. Lest ye forget, Family Guy was canceled in 2001, only to gain momentum in syndication in Cartoon Network's Adult Swim block, bag huge numbers in DVD sales, and return to Fox in an unheard of series resurrection in 2004. And give way to American Dad in 2005. And spawn successful spin-off The Cleveland Show in 2009. And launch its eleventh season in 2012. And earn its creator the hosting gig at the 85th Academy Awards. What would have quashed the aspirations of most industry upstarts only propelled MacFarlane into stardom, transforming him into something of a TV animation magnate along the way. But I digress. Ted is more than a message to Hollywood too. It's laugh-out-loud funny -- hilarious even -- and just sharp enough to suggest MacFarlane's world is about to get much, much bigger.

When a lonely little boy named John (Bretton Manley) makes a desperate wish that his teddy bear would come to life, the universe answers his plea and grants his stuffed friend a soul. Fast forward twenty-seven years. John (Mark Wahlberg) and Ted (Seth MacFarlane, providing the raunchy Ruxpin both a voice and motion capture performance) are roommates, and most everyone in their South Boston neighborhood has come to accept the talking teddy bear as a local fixture. Ted's obscene, tasteless antics are starting to wear thin, though, especially as far as John's girlfriend Lori (Mila Kunis) is concerned. Before long, Ted is looking for a job and an apartment, John and Ted find themselves on the outs, Lori and John split, and an obsessed fan (Giovanni Ribisi) kidnaps Ted to the devious delight of his barbaric son (Aedin Mincks). Can Ted forge a life apart from John? Can Lori and John make it work? Can they save poor Ted from a grisly fate? Can a cocaine-snorting, prostitute-wrangling, curse-spewing teddy bear sustain laughs for almost two hours?

I didn't have a lot of hope going into Ted. Its trailers left me grinning, sure... but that voice. MacFarlane's voice bothered me in the trailers and it bothers me in the film. Regardless of whether you love or loathe Family Guy, it's hard to get past the fact that Ted sounds like Peter Griffin. The tone is a bit deeper, the Baaahstin accent a bit thicker than Peter's nasally Rhode Island inflection, but the two, particularly when paired with MacFarlane's delivery, are strikingly similar. And while that may seem like a petty point on which to mount an attack, a distraction is a distraction, and no film benefits from a distraction. It doesn't help that much of Ted's humor relies on the same shock and awe comedy, boundary-breaching gags and rapidfire pop culture references as MacFarlane's animated stable. In another reality, Ted could be a Family Guy spin-off, and a successful one at that. In many ways, Ted's best bits are decidedly small screen, albeit upgraded with unabashedly crass R-rated content.

But put aside such hangups and give Ted even half a fighting chance, and you'll be lucky to catch your breath in between belly laughs. Comedy notwithstanding, MacFarlane and Wahlberg take the man-meets-talking-teddy-bear setup so seriously that the sincerity of it all is nothing short of refreshing. Most filmmakers would have built a story around the need to keep Ted's existence secret. Here Ted's existence is a given; the mystery and luster of his living, breathing, talking nature having already faded at some point between his "birth," his failed stab at celebrity stardom, and his attempts to land a working stiff's job at a supermarket. He isn't feared or misunderstood. He's just one of the guys. And it's in that seemingly throwaway nod to the mundane that Ted lands its fiercest punches. Bitter knockout, dragout fist fights are suddenly that much funnier. Sam Jones cameos are instantly that much more effective. John and Lori's relationship woes are that much more believable, the strains placed on Ted and John's friendship are that much more familiar, the already seamless CG is that much more convincing, and the entire film is that much more infectious. Granted, it's far from perfect -- the relatively inexperienced MacFarlane dons a few too many production hats, and it shows -- but you certainly won't forget it anytime soon. It's playing on my television now and, even muted, it's still making me laugh. I suppose that says plenty.

Ted isn't for everyone, but what comedy is? MacFarlane has crafted a genuinely funny bit of profane puppetry (or motion capturing I suppose), and anyone who gives it a shot will be surprised by just how much laughter they have pent up inside. Universal's Blu-ray release is even better, with a terrific video transfer, a solid DTS-HD Master Audio 5.1 surround track, and a nice batch of special features primed with even more laughs. Ultimately, I'm not sure if Ted will grow on me with age, but I'm willing to give it another go. Chances are you'll feel the same.

Summary: A party of a film. Not for the easily offended. Not for everyone.

[CSW] -2.6- Very well acted by all of the leads but especially Seth MacFarlane, providing the raunchy Ruxpin both a voice and motion capture performance. Ted as totally believable even in the fight scenes, however I guess I getting old because although I found it humorous I found it to be the juvenile humor that I have mostly outgrown. Most of the younger crowd should find this raunchy humor totally hilarious but it only made me chuckle (told you I'm getting old). Go, see it, and if you're not offended by raunchy humor you'll have a blast because even at my age and sensibilities, I was entertained.
[V4.5-A4.0] MPEG-4 AVC - No D-Box.

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